I feel like I have grown so much as a person this year. I have learned from many many...many ups and downs and have come out the other side as a more confident person who knows she can stand up for her self and be strong when others try her... either for herself or others. And I have also learned no matter how small the time you have with someone... It is special... It is worth it... Even if there is heart break at the end... You still come through with the good memories that will last forever, that you should cherish and never look negatively upon the good that has come from it.. Dont turn the positive times into negatives. Just learn when its time to look forward and move on. While saying some of this I am still dealing with the emotions... I am still learning and still working on my self to do this... But I do cherish every moment...
Saying that... I am going to start from the beginning... Not letting all my secrets out though... They are my business and I dont want/ or need others judgement on those decisions... Because I will not regret them.. ( not saying my readers would be one to judge, just being cautious. ) Any ways... I have had a long year... Had some marital insecurities come into play this year ( not on my side) That took a long and trying time to come back around... But as far as I know everything is wonderful again and has been since August... But I did get a new tattoo that was originally dedicated to that situation...But has come into play since in many other situations... It was very bumpy for a few months around here.. alot of crying ( on my side), alot of emotions I thought I would never have to face... while trying to decide what I was going to move onto if we would have decided on divorce... But through all of it I have learned to forgive, I have learned not only how to hold on to my beliefs but how to let go when others cant deal with the situations they have entered into openly and honestly... I have always and will always be a very open and honest person with whom ever earns my love and trust... and will forever love unconditionally... So with that I went and got a new tattoo on my wrists to remind me in hard times that.. Holding on isn't always the best thing.. Sometimes if holding on isn't enough ... then you must let go... and Im not saying not to be string and see it through... But sometimes that isn't an option...and I have had to learn this the hard way more than once this year... And its something that I am always going to have to remember that sometimes you just can't do everything it takes to hold on... as much as you may try... Sometimes for yourself you have to let go... Let go of emotions, let go of the past, let go of the hurt, the pain, the arguments, the life you once had or thought you would have... It could be a million things... But it is a good life lesson for me... A person who holds onto everything...
Moving past that ... We lost four of our Little ones this year...
Spanx ( ferret 8Y)- To His Lymphoma that had spread into his bowls. He was a fighter till the end and had a ton of spirit but in the end his bowls perforated and there was nothing that could be done. He passed at home curled up in his warm cover.
Medical issues with animals:
Where should we start? Ugh... its always something around here.. So a quick run through of the issues I remember...
Spanx (Ferret)- Lymphoma, intestinal issue from lymphoma, that had to be treated with Steroids and antibiotics..
Gaia( Hen)- Has been fighting infections on and off since she was spayed. Has been on several antibiotics... and Is on one now and finally the vet found out she was still internally laying and now we are working on getting her healthy again and she will get a hormone implant sometime in the beginning of the year to hopefully get her to stop laying.
Titan ( Rooster)- Broke his I believe left leg... Femur clear into and had to have surgical pins put into place... and although he isn't a hundred percent like the vet was hoping... He still limps around pretty good.. But he can still kick our asses... lol... and I am still afraid of him... and he is still with us :)
Moejo( Cat)- Watering eyes and just not feeling well.. Vet didn't find anything put him on meds... Said he might have some boney reconstruction in his nose and that I should take him to a vet clinic that has digital xrays ( they have a regular older xray machine) to check and make sure everything is ok... We plan on doing this also at the beginning on next year sometime.
Copper ( Cat)- Broke a canine and it needs removed ( 500.00 a tooth)
Seven ( Cat)- Had a broken Canine when we found her last year and it needs removed ( 500.00 a tooth)
Last but not least is one of the issues we are dealing with in the present...
Chloe (Dog)- She had been on pain meds last year for shoulder spasms... They started again this year so used her left over meds.. THey stoped thought all was well ill she started not wanting to walk down stairs and wasn't acting herself.. You could tell she was having pain in her front legs... and maybe her rear legs... about 10 days ago on a monday...Made her a vet appointment and went back to sleep with her and when I woke up about noon she couldn't use her rear legs and was dragging them... Rushed her to the vet for them to tell use she probably had a ruptured or partially ruptured disk to hurry and get an appointment at the Pittsburgh Veterinary specialty and emergancy center... And we took her in that night to hospitalize her.. They called the next morning after her MRI and said she had a severely ruptured disk and they were taking her into surgery... ( of course I am skipping all the tears and emotions... It was a long night and day and another day... it was very stressful !!!!) anyways.. took about an hour and 4o minutes for her surgery and I called to check on her.. The vet and everyone who works there are all extremly nice.. Talked to him and said it took a lil longer than expected cause he had to work around her ribs... But the rupture cleaned up very well he is excepting a pretty much full recovery.. Just no more jumping for her... but you can't tell the Chlo Chlo that and she has been trying us all... She is doign very well... Can walk again and pretty much can't tell she had surgery at only 11 days out... She still has a ways to go... But she is doing well :)
O a lil off topic... But we built a small outlet on to our porch for a small table :)
I do hope this coming year isn't as full of ups and downs... But I am ready to go into the new year and look forward to what the world has instore for me/ us :)
Update on food, New Years resolutions... and if I'm keeping this blog or starting anew... coming soon :)